One of the words that come to mind when I think of January is the cemetery. I’ve got a few family members who died this month. (this blog post is not depressing so keep reading!) The word cemetery has a double-meaning for me.
My first meaning to the cemetery is a bit twisted. For me, the cemetery is a space in my mind in which I would like store memories that I would like to put behind me for good and maybe even forget. However, knowing how the brain works, it stores knowledge subconsciously (you can’t control it!) and even the things you think you’ve forgotten will still pop up from time to time. As painful as some may be. It’s like visiting the cemetery.
The second meaning is the obvious one: a physical cemetery in which you visit your loved ones.
I’m not a religious person however I can’t call myself an atheist. I don’t believe in going to church. I don’t believe in organized religions. I don’t believe in miracles. I believe in chance and coincidence. I believe in reason. However I feel this huge inner conflict when I think of the dead. I don’t know what comes after death. All religions have a different belief on some form of a heaven or reincarnation. Maybe there’s nothing. Maybe we’re just atoms and when we die our bodies disintegrate and that’s it.
The only thing that ties me to religion are the dead. Or rather, a spiritual connection. I don’t pray to God for help but I ask for my dead loved ones’ help because I feel I’ve got a connection to them. I feel like they’re looking after me. I know, it sounds weird. Maybe they’re in heaven. Maybe they exist only in a subconscious state. Or maybe they’re not really there and us human beings only try to keep a connection to our dead loved ones because we cannot bare to think they don’t exist anymore. We’ll figure it out eventually 😉
My point is that the cemetery should not be perceived to be a place of sadness. I truly enjoy going to the cemetery and visiting my dead loved ones. As much as I believe in what’s in front of me, I still believe that there’s some form of spiritual workings in this world yet I’m not sure if they can be explained or not. Science and reason create a lot of questions in the world, but so does religion and spirituality.
Everyone has their own perspective, opinion or way of reasoning. That’s the beauty of something as simple as the cemetery. If you had to ask anyone how they feel about cemeteries, you’d definitely get different responses. It’s all about perspective.
Finally, I close this blog post with a poem (even though I’m not a poet) for one of my dead loved ones this month.